The Safety Link Podcast by Kenyon Manley

Embracing Life and Grief: A Deep Personal Conversation with Safety Professional Joe Martinez

Kenyon

Has the hustle and bustle of your workplace ever made you pause and wonder about the importance of mental health? This week, we've got Joe Martinez, safety professional at Glacier Construction, sharing his journey in the safety industry, which includes a stint at OSHA, and how he uses mindfulness to foster a positive work environment. Joe's experiences offer a fresh perspective on dealing with challenges in the workplace, emphasizing the integral role of mental health in the construction industry.

We're digging deep into the concept of mindfulness in the workplace, as Joe passionately advocates for mental health and supportive environments. He shares his transformation from a labor worker to a safety professional, proving that positivity and kindness can revolutionize a work setting. However, the conversation doesn't end there. We switch gears and delve into his personal life, discussing how he balances career growth with personal loss. Joe also reveals how his family has shaped him into the man he is today. 

Finally, we unfold a very personal chapter of Joe's life - the memory of his late daughter, Quinny, and the beautiful symbolism of butterflies in his life. We talk about the strength found in grief, understanding our true purpose, and the importance of asking for help. This conversation is a reminder that we all have the capacity to find beauty in our struggles, and how embracing difficult times can lead to personal growth. Join us for this deep, heartfelt conversation with Joe Martinez. You don't want to miss it!

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Speaker 1:

We ready, awesome. Well, welcome. Today. We got somebody here for you. His name is Joe Martinez. He's another safety professional. I'm going to let Joe tell you you know who he is, what he does, and then we'll go from there. Well, thank you for having me, kenyon. Yes, yes, yes, yes, been a long time coming. I know we've kind of rescheduled a couple of times, but, man, I'm glad that we got a link up today. So I'm Joe Martinez.

Speaker 1:

I am now with Glacier Construction. I've been there in November I'll be a year. I had a short stint at OSHA. Before that I was at a Wagner Caterpillar Wow. So I've been in the safety industry probably about little under nine years, man, and it's been great. I love it. Wow, you got to see it looks like you know from here in the US. It looks like you know from here and you really got to see a couple different, really some different sides of the industry did A lot of people don't always hear about on the back end.

Speaker 1:

You know, here it is. You're working at a for cat, at the equipment place. What did you do there while you were here? Because I don't think people a lot of people know exactly what happens at cat and what did you? What was your job for them as a safety manager? Yeah, so I, cat.

Speaker 1:

When I first started there, I was just a safety specialist. I was there for a couple months, got promoted to a regional safety specialist. Okay, I mean, man, cat is a. It's a different world, right? We had 5,000 employees in our region alone. Tons of you know injuries, accidents. I mean look what they mess with every day. They're messing with big heavy iron every single day, every day Cranes, rigging tools, line of fire. I mean that was it. It was a different beast. You know we had welders paint booths. I mean that was.

Speaker 1:

I love that place, though, man, I have nothing but good things to say about Wagner cat. It was a great experience for me. It was a definitely a learning opportunity. People don't realize. You know what those guys and girls put themselves through every day fixing these heavy. You know yellow iron is what I call it, right. You know I still see them on the side of the road and you know what we don't think about is a lot of these mechanics. They work by themselves and you know how do we know if someone goes down? You know you don't know, right, until something happens, or you know a certain, you know the owner of that iron comes by and sees them. But man, that's a tough industry and I could, I can't even imagine.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, I mean, and kind of what I did is I floated through New Mexico, colorado and then the West Texas region so I just overseen kind of. Well, I wasn't the manager, I had a manager above me, but I would go and make sure I mostly stayed on the inspection side. So I'd go inspect the facilities, because there's tons of caterpillar facilities, you know, in the western region itself. So I'd go, you know, do inspections on their facilities, make sure everything looked good. You know kind of what we do daily, right, right Ringing inspections, tool inspections, electrical cord inspections, fall pro inspections, and I would just try to, you know, lay another set of eyes on it, because you know what it's like in the safety industry. You get tunnel vision, you know, and you start not looking at certain things because you look at the same thing every day. Well, you don't know that, that synthetic strap starting to tear and tear more. So, yeah, I would just do that and travel a little bit with them and overseen a little bit what everybody was doing.

Speaker 1:

Awesome, awesome, wow. So I heard you, you know you went from there and then you went into the OSHA side of things. Wow, that's like a. I mean, what did you say? You went to the dark side, man, I did, you know, and. But at the end of the day, I'm not to me. For me that's the dark side is. It is the dark side, right, but at the end of the day, you guys are just helping implement and helping companies enforce the right thing for the employees actually doing the work. So it's really not the dark side, it is it's. You might see some dark things, but if you learn how to work with OSHA, they can definitely be a great partner. I've worked with them when I was in Minnesota, but they can definitely really help you get over the hump on if you're stagnant or you need some ideas.

Speaker 1:

So talk about, talk about OSHA, man, how, you know how, what made you even think about you know going that way and and you know just how that went. Yeah, so when I decided, you know I was at CAT and we had some leadership changes and then actually a recruiter for OSHA, a federal recruiter, reached out to me and honestly, I kind of said the same thing. I don't know if I can go to the dark side, you know. But I started thinking about it more and more and I said, you know, this might be a good, you know, career move for me, you know, because I, you know, as most safety nerds are, we do like the OSHA, you know, I mean we have to abide by the rules. So I'm like, hey, this is going to give me a direct insight of why we do things a certain way. I think it would be a good, you know, great opportunity for regrow.

Speaker 1:

So I started there and, like I said, it was a short, very short stint, I would say, you know, less than seven, eight months, kind of the day-to-day activities. You know, I was during my training periods, of course, so I was only able to go on a couple inspections. Unfortunately some of them weren't the best inspections to go and get your feet wet on. But I just, you know, I looked at a lot of the paperwork they called the FOM Field Operations Manual and I'd kind of just review and read I mean, that's really all I did at OSHA was read why we have to do things a certain way.

Speaker 1:

That's always intrigued me is well, why do we have to do that Like I'm always the first person to say, well, why do we have to do it that way? Like that doesn't make sense to me. So I'm always like I don't want to say, I challenge, but I just. Sometimes people just have to explain it to me a couple more times so it'll really hit home with me. You know OSHA, there's a lot of great people in OSHA. I still, you know, have some relationship with some of the senior officers over there and some of the compliance officers, and I still reach out to them, you know, monthly, weekly, daily, sometimes if I have a question well, why do we? Why is this regulation going to be changed in 2024?

Speaker 1:

Right, but you know, in the end of the day, the reason why I ended up deciding to leave OSHA, it just wasn't for me. There's no, no, no hard, no hard feeling set about it. It's just, and in my life I felt like I wanted more. You know, I wanted to mend a program, build a program to what I think a program should be. And I had the opportunity to chat with Glacier Constructions Vice President and we interviewed and we talked about if we'd be a good fit for each other, because it goes both ways Right has to be a good fit for me. But it has to be a good fit for you because my safety and leadership style is a lot different from probably 90% of the safety professionals. Right, you know, I'm kind of an in-your-face kind of guy. Right, like I, I challenge things because if I don't know if that's right, like I said, I want to understand why we do things in a certain way. Right, but, yeah, now I'm at Glacier Awesome man, that's really nice to hear.

Speaker 1:

Man, you know you go somewhere, don't work out, but you've gained some nuggets. And as you're talking, man, I'm listening and I'm actually seeing your story play out. Because, if you would think about how everything's happened for you, everything happened for a reason Absolutely Because you started out at Wagner. You got to see up close and personal, you learn how to do some inspections. Then you got excited about another career change that didn't work out, but what you got was you've got some connections, some relationships and you also probably learned how to do some some better research and finding out the why. Yeah, as far as why do I have to do it this way? Why can't we do it this way? So I see the story playing out and you know, and sometimes you're right, man, when those moves are made. You got to leave friends, you got to leave relationships, you got to leave all these other things, but it's, I think, what you're doing and maybe what you want to accomplish is way bigger than all of that Absolutely. So, really nice to hear that story. So I want to sort of get into.

Speaker 1:

You know, I like talking about, because I think that out there, with the men and women that are in our field we talked about this before about the safety professionals, the mothers, the fathers, the nurses and all these people that are needed in critical moments, right, I always wondered, you know, we have to come to work in a way that is uplifting and a way that is ready to take on some things that somebody's going through, because we all know our job. It's not just safety, absolutely, but it's safety in the aspect of maybe somebody's mind ain't right out there which we talk about money, situations, marriage, you know, the all-going things that we this cycles us that we have to fight through, but us, even though those things are going on, we have to come to work and be ready to assist and be a resource to somebody who's having those very same issues and we sort of got to forget about ours. Yeah, absolutely, but you really don't forget them, absolutely. So what do you do on a maybe on a day-to-day basis that could help somebody out there that is a nurse, that's a teacher, that's these different safety professionals, a fireman, a police officer, another new safety guy or even a seasoned safety guy that that may be going through something right now? What is it that you do to help you deal with those other things from work?

Speaker 1:

Yeah, so, every day, you know the way I look at it. Like you said, we all wake up with problems. Right, could be money, it could be. You know politics. I mean, every time I turn on the news it's something depressing, right, you know, I got it. I got a toddler at home, I got a wife, you know.

Speaker 1:

So let's just say, something happened that night. You know, I wake up and I'm still, you know, in a little funk, right, but as soon as I walk through that door, I have to put my, my problems to the side. But, like you said, I don't forget my problems, but I have to put them to a side. And the reason why I do that every single day is because I'm a resource for them, right, the way I look at it, I don't work for glacier construction. I work for the people, come on, man, and my goal every single day is obviously to keep my workers safe and obviously to keep glacier construction, you know, compliant, right?

Speaker 1:

But every day, my biggest thing is just building relationships with my team. Yes, so I could walk in the door and I could see someone with with a look on their face and I'll go up to them right away. Augustine, what's the matter, man? Oh, nothing, nothing, I said, man, I know you well enough. Now you know you've dealt with me for a year. Like I just love to build relationship with people, I loved that they can come talk to me about certain issues, because, to me, mental health is a real deal, right, I know we just went to a, to a conference together, a little, yes, speaking about it, but it's a real deal, it really is.

Speaker 1:

I mean, if you look at what's going on in the world, there's a lot of going on right now, man, a lot, you know, with money, inflation, federal shutdowns. I mean, every time you turn on the news, it's just negativity, man, right? So why do I want to go to work? Be negative, right, and bring my people down and then, while they're already going, possibly going through something yeah, if they're going through something, why do I want to be negative towards them? Right, my goal is to uplift people to kind of even if it's a crooked smile hey, I got something at you, right.

Speaker 1:

But my goal is because, if you think about it, with people who are in distress, they're thinking too much. What usually happens in a workplace injuries, accidents, near misses, right. So my goal is to always minimize that as much as possible and just be an uplifting, even if it's just for those couple moments that I'm there. But hey, at least I'm there listening to their concerns, talking to them. Right, even if they don't want to talk to them, they're still gonna talk to me. And we're gonna talk about something different football. You know that Broncos lose by 50, right.

Speaker 1:

You know, kind of make a little bit of joking, to kind of just direct their thoughts elsewhere for a little bit, right, because I mean, when I was coming up through the field, I was a labor, I was a equipment operator, I was a superintendent, I used to turn wrenches. You know, I kind of did a little bit of everything, or, you know, in my, my youth and the best safety professionals I had. It was just that one to talk to you, kind of be your friend, right, yeah, and a resource, right, and that's that's. Know, that that's what you are. I mean really understanding your, your, your place and your, your stance, and I guess I'm a type of person personally I'm alright with being just the hand, absolutely I'm alright with just being the leg, but if I need to be the body, the head, I can be that, you know.

Speaker 1:

But I just want to be able to fit in and and and make sure, at the end of the day, that that those, like you said, those folks that actually are doing the work, making the money for the company and are living in these hazardous environments, absolutely I want to make sure that they're taking care of because, don't nothing, run, don't know equipment, run, don't be no bills don't get paid without those men and women out there sweat, absolutely each endeavor, every day, coming to work and battling through, like you said, the various life challenges that we have every day, yeah, and elements to that's a huge one, to winter, cold, hot rains. No, it's, it's challenging, it is, it really is, and you know I've been, we're doing a lot of reading man with this mind and at first I had a, I had a different idea about it, but I've been listening a lot to it and reading a lot to it and I've come to realize that that there's, there's something there for us. I don't know how it goes, because it's, it's a deep, intertwined technique, if you ask me, because mindfulness, when I, when I read it, when I hear it, when I feel it, mindfulness is to me a thought of the thought. Mm-hmm, does that make sense? Yeah, a thought of the thought in that moment. But I think, with this mindfulness thing, if we learn how to use it right because the reason why I'm bringing this up is because you talked about people coming to work with you know these different things in mind and how we're trying to to maybe switch them a little bit, to get them off of that negativity and have them in a better energy, because now you got better quality, a safer, a safer worker, because a happy worker is a safe worker and then he knows that he got somebody he can lean on at the same time. Yep, but this mindfulness thing, I think can be very valuable in a sense where we learn how to help do what you said, switch their mind from that, that issue, and and, and what I mean by that is not that we just throw it to the side and act like it ain't never happened or there's not a problem, but being able to shift it for a moment as we work, mm-hmm. But then we're gonna see you after work the safety manager or the project manager and figure out what we can do for you to help get you back 100% fully thinking about what you're doing while you're here. Yeah, and I'm starting to see the, the, the slow grass to companies taking heed to the mental health realm of it. But I think we also, in a sense, can help with this mindfulness.

Speaker 1:

The problem I'm scared is is that when you think about mindfulness, I was thinking about the things that were creating the hysteria in my mental, because I mental health that ain't me, yeah. But when I started thinking about it, man, I got an issue here. Yeah, I got an issue here. I Got a little something going on over here. Man, I got some things going on like, yeah, like I started to see it. Like, as healthy as I am, I still got to take care of my mental. Yeah, because something can throw me off at the wrong moment. And what I think, too, is the word mental health. And I want you I don't want to cut you off I want you to talk about what you think about this. This whole mindfulness thing yeah, coming coming about, yeah. So this mindfulness thing is just what I think of.

Speaker 1:

Just you know, from this brief discussion we just had now, is we just got to open our minds, to kind of set in our own personal issues aside sometimes. I know there's times and I'll be the first one to agree with it. I, I know sometimes I let things eat me up to the point where it's you can't come back from it almost. You know what I mean and it's just like you know. But in the end of the day, are you breathing, is your family healthy? Do you have a roof over your head? Are you eating? Yes, so to me, and I know it's, it's tough, right, you know, but I'm blessed Every day. You just got to think that you're blessed. You woke up, you could walk, you can talk and you know. So you just got to be open and you know there's gonna be negativity, no matter what way you think about it right now. That's right. I mean, I'm not trying to be this way, but the world's pretty ugly right now. Right, I think you bring up a good point. I think you bring up a good point in the sense that what you're really saying, I think, is, is that you Put it aside, but but we got to deal. We got to deal with the problem, like, like it's it's, it's not gonna fester, it's just gonna get bigger. Yeah, cuz, you know, when you hold on to something, it just makes it bigger and bigger, bigger, bigger. So I think it's it's learning.

Speaker 1:

One which I hope that Throughout this, this, these podcasts, is that we can begin to teach safety profession. We can begin to teach the actual safety professional Um, whether it's dealing with somebody or dealing with themselves, maybe some, some points of how that looks or even cope coping or be or being able how to cope with that. Yeah, so, yes, 100% man, we got to be able to teach them that when you come to work, you got to be focused on absolutely you know. But at the same time, I Want you to let me know that you have some issues so I can help you. Yeah, cuz, I care about you. Yeah, and that kind of brings me my next point about that too.

Speaker 1:

You know, safe Prep safety professionals can't be everywhere at all times, right, that's right. So that goes down to frontline leadership. That's why it's so important to building relationships. Even I'm not saying you have to hang out with this person every day, but you just got to build a relationship with that person, that's right, right. So if I'm not there to understand that this individuals hurt today, well, he's probably not the best candidate to go into a confined space today. Right, that's not saying go home and figure it out. No, no, no, let's, let's talk about it. Well, we'll have, you know, rural risk management. Yeah, we'll have somebody else going there today.

Speaker 1:

You know, let's talk about it. You know, just tell me a little bit what's going on. We all got to help each other. That's right, and I know that's what me and you always preach each other. We always got to grow each other, help each other. We have for each other and the way I look at it, this is something what I preach to my guys every week.

Speaker 1:

How many hours do you see your coworkers? 40 hours. So how many hours do you see your family? Right, think about it. No matter if you like that person, you can't stand that person. You know, at the end of the day, you got to figure out how to work with. You got to figure out how to work with them. You see this person more than you see your wife, right? So do you want to see this person hurt, killed, anything like that? No, I mean, and I would hope not coming in our field. Yeah, absolutely right.

Speaker 1:

But that's what I'm saying and I always preach that to my guys about that, and you know, we got into that whole speed about mental health from this last month and you hear the word mental health. What do you think about? What's wrong with me? Right, there's something wrong with me. Right To me that I don't think that's mental health, right, I mean, as soon as I really started dying, I call that society, yeah, yeah, but I started really digging into mental health because, you know I'll be transparent, I really didn't know much about it. So I started going to more of these seminars, listening to more conversations, more talks, reading more, doing research, right? Because when I first heard the word mental health, I'm like there's something wrong with me. Then.

Speaker 1:

No, it's just, everyone copes with things different, right? And if somebody says they don't have mental health issues, I mean I would like to meet them right because, like you just said, I got mental health issues here here. Here, we all do. Yes, that's kind of life, that's kind of the in the in the society we're in right now, it's very rare if you don't have mental health issues right. Even in the billionaires, trillionaires, I mean, they always have problems right. So it's just a thing in this world and I'm glad that it's had so much Media attention about mental health and I think it is hitting home to certain yes, the certain parties that actually need it right. I hope it continues to grow in construction, because during that last conference that we just went to listening about how many, you know, suicides are our construction industry, I was number one and construction, yeah, I was literally mind-blowing.

Speaker 1:

I thought it would be like, you know, first responder or something like that, just because day in, day out, you see so much bad Negativity alive. But no, it's construction. Construction that's our trade, that's what we do day and day out, day in and day out, and if we do not build relationships with our team members, it's gonna change, it happen. Like you said, we can't be everywhere, you know, at all times, but least if we're a voice when they need it. Yes, we are there. Yes, and I know as myself, as a safety professional, I'm definitely far from perfect and I think a lot of safety professionals would say the same thing, and that's that's.

Speaker 1:

That's good to hear too, man, the humbleness like, because to To gain everything that you say, what you said, there has to be a humbleness in yourself to that relationship, right, yeah, the when you're trying to create that relationship, you got to be able to lend yourself, yeah, and then the more and more that you're out there, the more you lend, so, and then that's how the relationship is gained. But there's a. There has to be a little bit of humility and vulnerability. And vulnerability in our position, yeah, as we, we move through, because you know as well as I do, they, they look up to us, even though they hate us, sometimes hate us or we're just regular people job, they just got this as a, as a job, we just want a different career path, that's it. So I always explain. But it they look up to the management and we got to be able to lend ourselves To that.

Speaker 1:

You know, I was, I was laughing the other day because I was going through some my, my, my podcast only got A four or five of them out there and you know, through the weeks just listening, and there's just some, some things that keep coming up. One is relationships. Two is the guys in the field, and we're going to hit on another one because I want you to talk about. You know what you do, you know after you know all of this, but but those those things, those two things have come up and I'm convinced person that more companies lose money from relationships than they do anything else. Absolutely, because, check this out, you you separate work from home and home from work Greatest thing alive.

Speaker 1:

But if you was to bring home to work, somebody's asked you a question or you're dealing with somebody who's maybe been doing some stuff, then this is like the second time or something. You're having a bad day and while you guys are talking, this guy begins to yell out at you and now it turns into well, I'll fire you and then you fire him. But in all actuality, when he was talking to you, he was screaming at you because he's frustrated from something at home. Here it is you done bring something in from home with yourself and you ain't really hearing the cry out, cause if we really knew him we would have said he doesn't usually act that way.

Speaker 1:

But when these people come in to work, these relationships whether it's with the client, the people and there's money involved oh my goodness, like if somebody is just on their own mental or has got some things going on, man, that could mess, you can mess up the next project. You can just lose a lot of money, man, oh yeah, through relationships. So it's nice to hear these things are so important, because to me, a great relationship doesn't mend if your character isn't taking care of, if your emotions you don't know how to manage your emotions, if your mental health isn't together. All these things that create a relationship we gotta take care of them, whether it's us or helping somebody do that thing, like you hit it on the head. I mean we as safety professionals, we gotta almost be a chameleon. We gotta mold to what needs us to be.

Speaker 1:

Come on, man, you know one day we're gonna be an HR. You know the next day I'm gonna be a psychiatrist. The next day I'm gonna be your safety guy, that's right. Or the next day I might be your punching bag, right, hey, I'm all for it, because me, as the man I am today, I had a great family that helped me. They listened to my all my crap growing up. Right on, man, come on, you know so a lot of these young people that I deal with day in and day out like, hey, I don't wanna be a father figure to you, I just wanna be a mentor to you. You know everybody has their own daddies, right? Yes, I just wanna be a mentor to you and, to the best of my ability, help you grow into whatever position you do. Wanna go in within the organization or outside the organization If someone leaves and we had a great relationship. Here's my business, my personal business card. Please reach out to me if you ever need anything.

Speaker 1:

I'm still there for people and I think that's what kinda a lot of safety professionals are. I mean, I still reach out to a lot of my old safety professionals. Come on, man, it's because and that link, man, it's a connection and, the way I look at it, it's a friendship. I mean I generally think. I mean some of them might think that, but that's a friend of mine. You know we're acquaintances, friends, whatever you wanna call it, but yes, you know, you gotta be there for people. You got to. You got to, no matter what way you think about it.

Speaker 1:

If you say nobody was there for me growing up, I mean you always had somebody for the most part. There are certain circumstances where someone didn't have anybody. Right, like really, yeah, absolutely. But I try to be there for everybody as much as possible, and I know sometimes I'm overwhelmed with certain things, but I'll eventually get back to you and no doubt and try to be there for whatever. You need me to be that chameleon, you know? Yes, yeah, yeah, being able to To adapt to what they need. That's my biggest thing too is I try to adapt to whatever situation. It is right, it could be someone's emotional work, they need a raise. You hear it too. Everything.

Speaker 1:

You go to a job site and they think you're in charge of how much they're making. Come on, man, I'll bring it up for you. That's all I can do, man, that's it. Well, I want to move up within the organization. I'll bring it up for you, but you got to push for it, you got to want. You know, right, I'm all for throwing words around putting bugs in everybody's ears. If that's what you want and I genuinely think you're a great candidate for it Absolutely, I'll go to bat for you. Wow, yeah, no doubt, man.

Speaker 1:

I try to tell people you're your own entrepreneur, absolutely Like. You don't get a raise because of me, you get a raise because of what you do. You got to do it for yourself and you got to work on yourself daily. You got to present yourself, you got to brand yourself, sell yourself Like there has to be, and that's the greatest thing about really looking at yourself in the mirror is like you can tell what you need. You know what they're asking for. Fix what you need to fix. You know what's holding you back. You know what's causing you to have a bad attitude. Like fix those things, man, because at the end of the day, as you present yourself, as you're creating relationships, as you're creating friends or new family members, whatever, however you want to take them, it has to be you taking care of you. Number one. You got to make yourself presentable. That's right. And sell yourself. I mean, don't ask nobody for no raise.

Speaker 1:

You ask for the raise, show why you need a raise, because a lot of people think they need a raise because they've been working there for 15 years, coming to work on time, but you get paid to do that. You get paid to do that. No matter how long you worked at this, you get paid to do that. Show me something extra. Get you some more education. Get you a certification. Go out and help somebody else outside of your work. Right, because sometimes you got to reach outside of what you actually do Absolutely.

Speaker 1:

And when people start seeing your value, now you can talk about hey, I should be getting a raise. You got to have the separation from you to that next person. You got to be on the same course yourself. Man, go ahead. I always say you got to be a hustler. You got to want to have more than somebody else. That's right. Right, because the way I look at it, how many safety professionals are in this world? A lot, a lot. What separates me from somebody else? You know there are certain things and there are certain things that people do better than I do. You just got to learn how to sell yourself, sell yourself worth and kind of know that's right. You know it's tough out there. It is, man.

Speaker 1:

So tell me about your family, what you do outside of being a safety manager, safety director. What do you like to do? I know what you like to do. Let the people out there know what you like to do, and then, once you're done with that, I want you to talk about what your expertise is. As far as when I say expertise, what do you say is your that you say I know this well enough? Yeah, absolutely so with me.

Speaker 1:

I'm a father. I have a beautiful wife. We've been married eight years now. We've got a 12. I have a son. I have two kids.

Speaker 1:

One unfortunately did not make it. That's why I have this tattooed Quinn Rose OK, wow, did know that. Yeah, so she made it five days. Wow. So, yeah, that was tough. You talk about, we talk about mental health. Come on, man, you know. So that was tough. And let's hit that right there, because I want to know this right here is what we gotta be given to our brothers and sisters out here. How did you deal with that man? It was tough. So me and my wife I mean, I got the chills right now and I'm not afraid to show it I got the Quinn Martinez bracelet, you know, the cross, the tattoos.

Speaker 1:

So me and my wife, we had to do a vitro, right, so that's IVF. So we went through all that. About 25, 26 weeks my wife started having contractions. They're like oh, it's just Braxton Hicks contractions, right. So the next day they ended up admitted in the hospital. They're like you're in labor, they're like huh. So we ended up having my daughter and you know, when you're born at 25 weeks you're severely preemie, right, that's half the time you're in the oven. So with that, she was born like her heart wasn't fully developed, her lungs weren't fully developed and we honestly thought I mean we prayed every single night in the hospital. I want to hear that again. You did what Prayed every single night in the hospital, me and my wife.

Speaker 1:

My daughter was in the incubator, you know the blue lights and everything, and it was tough. Man, that was the toughest thing I've ever had to do as a father. And I know my wife, she was a saint for dealing with it. I mean she went through it right, came out of her body. I went through it with her. That's the way I look at it, because the mother relationship to the children is always a lot stronger, right. That connection's there from day one. The father has to gain that connection.

Speaker 1:

So dealing with that, I mean that's why I said mental health was a big deal. I know I have mental health issues. I mean I lost my daughter, but I have two children and it sounds like you still could be. You still are slowly dealing with some things, trying to nestle that into a good place, right? Yeah, Wow, man. So I always say every bad has its good right.

Speaker 1:

So, like I said, my wife, we had to do in vitro, so we weren't supposed to get pregnant naturally. My son was born naturally, come on, man. So you know there's always those that word rainbow babies, stuff like that. But I have a beautiful five-year-old son, man. So my daughter was born April 15, 2017. My son was born March 10, 2018, year apart. So she's still involved in our life. We deliver her flowers, my son.

Speaker 1:

We always say let's go see Quinny. You know, that's like her. We symbolize the butterflies as that's her. So we're big outdoors people. We have a property up at Red Feathers Campground right outside of there. So all my nieces and nephews, if we see butterflies, we always say there's Quinny. You know it's kind of a funny story, as last weekend my goddaughter and my niece were dancing at Riverdale Ridge junior cheerleader. There was a butterfly right next to my goddaughter. So I'm really into that kind of stuff.

Speaker 1:

You know I don't want to say it like spiritual, but I am, you know. I really do believe in that kind of stuff, and there is reasons for that, no doubt. Yeah, it was tough, right, I mean that's good man, because I'm a Christian myself. So when I hear that story, man, I'm listening to you because I could still hear it. It's probably not as bad as it was the first day, but there's still some loss there. Oh, there's severe sadness every April 15th, because it's my thing is like, why hurt?

Speaker 1:

But what I see, though, is where maybe some of us get caught up is that you're dealing with it by stepping actually into the very thing that is having you this way. Right, you go to the grave, you represent her on your arm, you wear a bracelet Like it's present, right, and I think that's so important, because we try to run away from the very thing that is going to make us to be who we are supposed to be. You know, and it's sadly to say, it's these tough things, but, like we try to pray them away, we try to say I don't want to do this, but it's those things, you know, in the valley, it's those things that, when you're, they feel so tough and you feel, you know, by yourself. It's those things that if you just continues taking one step at a time instead of trying to outrun the process, just let the process run towards you and accept it. You ain't going to like it, but when you come out on the other side, well, you're going to be something special, it's going to take you to another level and when you look back, you're going to laugh because it's going to be something that you're going to say man, I never even thought I was going. What I went through was going to come to fruition, because now I'm actually dealing with this. If I wouldn't have that, where would I be? So yeah, man, that's what holds me about your story right.

Speaker 1:

There is that you guys are continually welcoming the very thing that a lot of people run away from, and that's where I think when they start running away from it, the longer they run away from it, the more problems they have, the more problems they have, and then they don't even really know how to deal with it because it just it just spiraled out Absolutely. And that's one thing that my wife, my wife is a saint. She, every April 15th dealing with you, she has to be saint, exactly, but every April 15th of my sons in school. We pull them out of school because that's a special day, right, it's sister's birthday. We do something fun that day Aquarium, zoos, anything like that. I mean we still celebrate her birthdays like everybody would normally do. She's gone, but not forgotten, that's right and that's kind of the way.

Speaker 1:

My wife is the one that, because, I mean, I grieve different. Everybody grieves different Everybody. And my wife still says all the time you didn't really relieve your grief, but I just didn't grieve the way she did. Right, and there might be one day when you will release Absolutely, it's just not right now. I mean, the way I look at it, my son, he's here for a reason, right? Yeah, he was there to. Our hearts were broken. He was there to help heal it and that wasn't by accident. Right, that was the way I look at it. Someone knew that our hearts were broken and someone knew that need to be glued back together. And that's how we say it, you know, and we deal with it.

Speaker 1:

And well, that's good, man, I thank you because it's these testimonies, man, that I think you know we want to put out there because, again, going back to what I said before, it's like who's taking care of us, right? I hope that you know, with our friendship and relationship, that now that we are probably going to be closer and closer through more interaction and all those things and smoking some cigars, that's right, Some cigars, yeah. Fishing with you, yeah, doing those things that we can lend these testimonies to each other and actually know that somebody else has been added to the repertoire, right, yeah, that I can lean on Kenyia on, or I can lean on Joe, I can lean on Perry, perry can lean on Joe, you know. And making it more tight-knit, heck, we just ran into something just today, that big old monster, big old monster man, but needing a little bit of help to uplift and upgrade his experience and knowledge, and don't know where to go. Well, we've volunteered ourselves, the way I look at it, and he's a brother man. Yeah, if you don't share your story, but nobody's going to know what your story is, nobody's going to know your story. So that's when I was approached by you and Eddie, I'm like, yeah, I don't know what I'm going to talk about, but I'm in. Yeah, I don't know what I talk about and what my expertise is. Yes, might be somewhere where they might need my help. Yes, man, and so I'm thankful for you coming to spend time over here. I hope I get every safety manager from every company here in Colorado man, that'd be awesome To get on here, talk about themselves and be of value. You know what I'm saying, because we don't get a lot of taps on the back, we don't get a lot of the thank yous, because you know we are in a support role. But I tell you this We've then saved a lot of money, saved a lot of lives, saved a lot of agony through our work. Man and I'm gonna pat us on the back, we gonna pat each other on the back.

Speaker 1:

They continue pushing through this day because there's sometimes, joe and I'm gonna be totally honest with the listeners sometimes when I go home, like my kids don't even realize sometimes my wife, they're like what are you doing out there? And I'm downloading. I'm getting everything out of my mind because I know as soon as I go through the door, the dog, my five-year-old, my 14-year-old, my wife, they want me, yeah, they want dad. Yes, they don't want Ken young, right, they want dad. They want dad and husband.

Speaker 1:

And I wanna make sure that I'm clear on my next day and that my mind is clear and it's nothing but love when I get in there and, like you said, they're all of me, man, and that's one thing that I do when I go home because I got an hour or some change ride, it's people like I know, you do it. It's the greatest thing. It's a decompression. I'm thankful for it because I'm able to decompress and go home and be the man I'm supposed to be. Yeah, because you have that hour and a half, though. Yes, you want to wine, collect your inner thoughts, yes, process your thoughts and then, when you want one, by the time I'm sure you're pulling your house. Holy crap, I'm already home. I know, you know what I mean. And then you're like well, my mind's clear. Now I can be a dad.

Speaker 1:

Yes, yes, man, yeah, and there's times where it's tough, yeah, you know, but I think it just taking a minute, five minutes, whatever it is, but just gathering yourself and just really focusing, because, to me, when you take time out and you focus, you actually see the moment. Because see when we're driving. To be honest with you, when we're driving we're doing other things. Oh yeah, the toxicity of the world is so much that we aren't really seeing the moment. We're just making all these quick decisions to get through it. But to actually recognize it, there has to be a focus, there has to be steelness to get into that space so that you can embody the moment. You know, sometimes we live in the moment but it's so abstract because we're trying to solve this and solve this and solve this. It's like just take the moment and realize where you're at, realize that, yes, you got this and you got that, and figure out how you're going to attack it. But if you just stay abstract, you take these moments and they just keep getting you mad, upset, putting you in a bad place. So, yeah, man, just really helping people get focused at work and being who they're supposed to be. So again, man, I really thank you. Man, this ain't your last time on this podcast.

Speaker 1:

Again, I'd like to thank my partner in crime over there. Come on over here, eddie. Come on man. Yeah, show the viewers who this.

Speaker 1:

Yes, the guy behind the scenes helping out, this is my man, eddie. I just want to say thank you to him. He's just really given me an opportunity to do some things for Alliance safety, for me, for him and for the safety professionals here throughout the country, whether it's here or Colorado, whatever, but I just want to say thanks and I wanted to put your face on there because, again, a lot of these guys that create and do all these other things back behind the scenes don't? They actually don't even like being in front of the camera. So that's why I brought him out here, because he's a little shy, he's sweating and, yeah, he's the guy. Thank you, introduce yourself. Yeah, introduce yourself. You ain't going nowhere, man. Come on, man, tell us a little bit about yourself. Okay, next time. So we'll hold him to that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Thanks again, eddie. Thank you out there for the listeners, the likes, the subscribes. We appreciate you. We'll talk to you later.